As a domestic violence and sexual assault counselor, people always ask me about the difficulty of handling the job and my own well-being. Yes, the work can be pretty tough, but I think I handle my work pretty well (so far). What gives me headaches seems to be my life outside of my job.
I feel fulfilled through working even though it can be quite tiring. Things are in place and I know what I need to do, and how to do it. However, after a long day of work, I arrived home feeling lost and confused. I'm stumbled on the most mundane things in my daily life-- keeping my place tidy, finding what to eat, taking care of my own bills and responsibility. Those things seem simple, but I feel so unmotivated completing them. And moreover, sometimes I feel pretty purposeless.
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Sunday, March 19, 2006
March 16 was a beginning of new things
March 16, I started my new job, or new position, I should say.
There is nothing radically different in terms of what I do, but a change is a change. It is fortunate that I'm still around the people I'm familiar with. I can see that this job will be more fulfilling for me personally and professionally (not monetary). I know my new boss since I was an intern and I'm glad to work under her since she's very supportive and knows what I do (counseling). On the other hand, I see a lot of challenges ahead of me, but I am looking forward to overcome them. I think this will be a definitive moment for me as a counselor.
March 16, my friend Lisa gave birth to the very healthy Gabrielle. Happy Birthday! I found it so amazing because I was working with Lisa everyday during the past 7 or 8 months and I became a witness of this inspiring process.
Everyday, new lives are born. Everyday, many die and decay. Everyday, there is an end to a story. But everyday, there is also a new beginning for a new story. The cycle never ends. It may sound unbearably hopeless, but it can also make people feel forever hopeful.
There is nothing radically different in terms of what I do, but a change is a change. It is fortunate that I'm still around the people I'm familiar with. I can see that this job will be more fulfilling for me personally and professionally (not monetary). I know my new boss since I was an intern and I'm glad to work under her since she's very supportive and knows what I do (counseling). On the other hand, I see a lot of challenges ahead of me, but I am looking forward to overcome them. I think this will be a definitive moment for me as a counselor.
March 16, my friend Lisa gave birth to the very healthy Gabrielle. Happy Birthday! I found it so amazing because I was working with Lisa everyday during the past 7 or 8 months and I became a witness of this inspiring process.
Everyday, new lives are born. Everyday, many die and decay. Everyday, there is an end to a story. But everyday, there is also a new beginning for a new story. The cycle never ends. It may sound unbearably hopeless, but it can also make people feel forever hopeful.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
laundry robbery
some sick fuck stole all my clothes from the dryer (underwear, socks, bed sheets).
I'm furious.
Somewhere, some mothefucker is wearing my underwear. This is disturbing.
I wish his dickhead burns in flames.
I'm furious.
Somewhere, some mothefucker is wearing my underwear. This is disturbing.
I wish his dickhead burns in flames.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Mogwai songs
Mogwai songs have no lyrics, but because of their names, I dedicated:
“Hunted by a Freak” to the 78-year-old lawyer who got shot by Dick Cheney
“Stanley Kubrick” to Steven Spielberg to remind him that he does not know shit about Kubrick (and A.I. sucks)
“My Father, My King” to George Bush Sr.
“2 Rights Make 1 Wrong” to right wing stupid fucks.
“You Don’t Know Jesus” to Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson.
“I am not Batman” to George Clooney
“Angels vs. Aliens” to Tom Cruise and Issac Hayes
“Emergency Trap” to FEMA
“Glasgow Mega-Snake” to Tommy Lee… oops, he’s not from Scotland.
“Hunted by a Freak” to the 78-year-old lawyer who got shot by Dick Cheney
“Stanley Kubrick” to Steven Spielberg to remind him that he does not know shit about Kubrick (and A.I. sucks)
“My Father, My King” to George Bush Sr.
“2 Rights Make 1 Wrong” to right wing stupid fucks.
“You Don’t Know Jesus” to Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson.
“I am not Batman” to George Clooney
“Angels vs. Aliens” to Tom Cruise and Issac Hayes
“Emergency Trap” to FEMA
“Glasgow Mega-Snake” to Tommy Lee… oops, he’s not from Scotland.
Sunday, March 12, 2006
Street Walking Man
Since I don’t have a car temporary now, I decided to walk around my “neighborhood” on this Saturday afternoon. The weather was okay. It was a little hot but really windy. At least I didn’t have to sweat like a pig.
I walked down Waugh Drive, as I planned to walk by Montrose then to Sound Exchange on Richmond. It has been a while since I really “walk down the streets”. Houston is so car-oriented (as in most places in the States), it is not really walker-friendly. But at least around Montrose, there are more pedestrians and shops (and sidewalks).
The sight of the neighborhood down Waugh looked very different to me today because I was walking the opposite direction of this one-way street. Besides, just the fact that I was walking instead of riding in a car made a lot of differences.
As I passed by the Chinese Consulate Office on Montrose, I saw a group of Falun Gong practitioners doing their “exercise” in front of the building. I think I saw them more than once before, but this time they even had a black dude in the group. I don’t really know what’s the deal with them. Are they really a cult? Or were they innocent yoga-like practicing people? The Chinese government’s side of the story is definitely unreliable (like 10 times more unreliable than Scott McClellan) but Falun Gong definitely looks a little “cult-ish”.
Then I walked onto Richmond and stopped at Lucky Burger. There was a car accident right across the street and the two cars involved looked quite damaged. I was sitting in the restaurant eating as I saw the traffic stalled. God, I hate traffic accidents (even though I was not involved).
Finally I arrived at Sound Exchange. I can’t find any records I want to buy. But it is always nice to flip through those piles of vinyl. I don’t have anything better to do anyway. Then I walked to Cactus Records nearby. As I walked in the door, I could feel the blaze of heat attacking me there. There wasn’t any air conditioning and there were people watching the in-store performance. Dude, I know you guys are closing but how can you be that cheap. It totally reminded me of my ex-roommate Sean Martin the fucking ass hole. That sick fuck had me endured 5 weeks of 90 degrees of heat in the apartment (which he claimed is a “condo”). I wished he would die of syphilis. Well, back to Cactus: 90% of their shelves were empty already when I got there. I tried to find the first album of Camera Obscura and the Royal Tenenbaums DVD but I came out empty-handed. Shit I could not wait to get out of that store and it felt like Heaven when I walked into the air-conditioned Book Stop.
As I tried to walked back home through Westheimer, I saw a lot of people walking in-and-out of thrive stores. I walked into one and they have pretty cool and good-priced clothes. But I was in no mood of clothing-shopping. Too bad they don’t have any records to sell. I decided to walk back to Montrose so that I could look for the Royal Tenenbaums DVD there. Coincidently, I met my friend Steve in the store (as he was visiting Nadia). That DVD costs $19.99 there and I remembered the price is like 15 bucks on the internet (www.deepdiscountdvd.com, great prices there). So I told myself to behave and save it for later.
At last, I was going home. Then I walked in to this interesting store I saw every time I drove by Waugh. They sell South American crafts and decorations there. It was one of those stores that I see all the time but never make an effort to walk inside. They have pretty cool hats (or sombreros).
Jesus fucking Christ, I spent most of my night looking for cars on the internet. It is a pain in MY ass. I am totally lost and confused. I welcome any suggestion or advice from anyone.
I walked down Waugh Drive, as I planned to walk by Montrose then to Sound Exchange on Richmond. It has been a while since I really “walk down the streets”. Houston is so car-oriented (as in most places in the States), it is not really walker-friendly. But at least around Montrose, there are more pedestrians and shops (and sidewalks).
The sight of the neighborhood down Waugh looked very different to me today because I was walking the opposite direction of this one-way street. Besides, just the fact that I was walking instead of riding in a car made a lot of differences.
As I passed by the Chinese Consulate Office on Montrose, I saw a group of Falun Gong practitioners doing their “exercise” in front of the building. I think I saw them more than once before, but this time they even had a black dude in the group. I don’t really know what’s the deal with them. Are they really a cult? Or were they innocent yoga-like practicing people? The Chinese government’s side of the story is definitely unreliable (like 10 times more unreliable than Scott McClellan) but Falun Gong definitely looks a little “cult-ish”.
Then I walked onto Richmond and stopped at Lucky Burger. There was a car accident right across the street and the two cars involved looked quite damaged. I was sitting in the restaurant eating as I saw the traffic stalled. God, I hate traffic accidents (even though I was not involved).
Finally I arrived at Sound Exchange. I can’t find any records I want to buy. But it is always nice to flip through those piles of vinyl. I don’t have anything better to do anyway. Then I walked to Cactus Records nearby. As I walked in the door, I could feel the blaze of heat attacking me there. There wasn’t any air conditioning and there were people watching the in-store performance. Dude, I know you guys are closing but how can you be that cheap. It totally reminded me of my ex-roommate Sean Martin the fucking ass hole. That sick fuck had me endured 5 weeks of 90 degrees of heat in the apartment (which he claimed is a “condo”). I wished he would die of syphilis. Well, back to Cactus: 90% of their shelves were empty already when I got there. I tried to find the first album of Camera Obscura and the Royal Tenenbaums DVD but I came out empty-handed. Shit I could not wait to get out of that store and it felt like Heaven when I walked into the air-conditioned Book Stop.
As I tried to walked back home through Westheimer, I saw a lot of people walking in-and-out of thrive stores. I walked into one and they have pretty cool and good-priced clothes. But I was in no mood of clothing-shopping. Too bad they don’t have any records to sell. I decided to walk back to Montrose so that I could look for the Royal Tenenbaums DVD there. Coincidently, I met my friend Steve in the store (as he was visiting Nadia). That DVD costs $19.99 there and I remembered the price is like 15 bucks on the internet (www.deepdiscountdvd.com, great prices there). So I told myself to behave and save it for later.
At last, I was going home. Then I walked in to this interesting store I saw every time I drove by Waugh. They sell South American crafts and decorations there. It was one of those stores that I see all the time but never make an effort to walk inside. They have pretty cool hats (or sombreros).
Jesus fucking Christ, I spent most of my night looking for cars on the internet. It is a pain in MY ass. I am totally lost and confused. I welcome any suggestion or advice from anyone.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Movies & I (part 1.5)
This is not an exact continuation of the last related blog (Movies & I part 1). Actually, I’m writing this in response to the recent Oscars results (and how it affected my views as a movie fan). I can never hide my disdain for that stupid award ceremony, for its legendary bad taste (Raging Bull, 2001, Citizen Kane got no shit from them). This year was probably more acceptable since there were a lot of “small” quality production in competition. So much about “Crash” upsetting “Brokeback Mountain”…. I haven’t seen it yet, but I bet it is probably going to be better than Titanic, Gladiator, Shakespeare in Love, Lord of the Rings III and many more mediocre-or-piece-of-shit movies. At least it’s not TRASH.
Ang Lee finally became the first non-white person to win the best director award. George Clooney may try to make Hollywood liberal. But Hollywood is just as conservative as your grandma’s choice of underwear. It takes almost 80 fucking years for a non-white person to break it through. Black actors/actresses can’t get any recognition unless they play thugs or musicians or fucked by a white man. And you don’t even many other minorities playing any significant roles in American movies, except for racially stereotyped roles. They played so many stereotyped roles-- I think those stupid comics can stop making their stupid politically incorrect jokes or skits.
I hope Ang Lee’s recognition would give light to other budding Chinese filmmakers. Tarantino the knucklehead may think that Hong Kong movies may be the best thing in the world, but the truth is Hong Kong movies suck worse than the last blow job you get from a five-dollar hooker. There is practically no independent movie scene: I have met one indie filmmaker and the only way to “make it to the game” for him and his fellow filmmakers is to catch to eye of major studios and make crap like everyone else. Wong Kar-Wai is one of the very few who manages to maintain doing his own stuff (I still don’t understand who he managed to do so). In Ang Lee’s home country Taiwan, they have some really great directors (possibly better than Lee), but it is a dying scene over there. In China, they have a lot of good directors too but the government censorship is suffocating. Then in my home Macau, there are two fucking theaters in the whole town… so please don’t even mention about a movie scene (actually I know there was this one person who made an independent movie which was shown in Hong Kong for a few weeks, and that’s about it). Hence, it is pretty hard out here for a pimp (or filmmaker in this case).
Legend has it that everyone who bought the initial printing of the Velvet Underground’s debut went on to form their own bands. I hope the mainstream recognition of Ang Lee will inspire other young Chinese people to follow his footsteps. It is time to start the revolution.
XXXXX
On a side note, I don’t seem to hear much about the controversy of the “gayness” of Brokeback from the other side of the globe? No one seems to care much about that. Everyone is just happy for Lee. According to my friend Andy, “Brokeback Mountain” became the first and only “indie” movie shown in a theater in Macau (I still can’t believe they actually show something other than Narnia). None of the other nominees were ever in theaters, not even in Hong Kong.
Ang Lee finally became the first non-white person to win the best director award. George Clooney may try to make Hollywood liberal. But Hollywood is just as conservative as your grandma’s choice of underwear. It takes almost 80 fucking years for a non-white person to break it through. Black actors/actresses can’t get any recognition unless they play thugs or musicians or fucked by a white man. And you don’t even many other minorities playing any significant roles in American movies, except for racially stereotyped roles. They played so many stereotyped roles-- I think those stupid comics can stop making their stupid politically incorrect jokes or skits.
I hope Ang Lee’s recognition would give light to other budding Chinese filmmakers. Tarantino the knucklehead may think that Hong Kong movies may be the best thing in the world, but the truth is Hong Kong movies suck worse than the last blow job you get from a five-dollar hooker. There is practically no independent movie scene: I have met one indie filmmaker and the only way to “make it to the game” for him and his fellow filmmakers is to catch to eye of major studios and make crap like everyone else. Wong Kar-Wai is one of the very few who manages to maintain doing his own stuff (I still don’t understand who he managed to do so). In Ang Lee’s home country Taiwan, they have some really great directors (possibly better than Lee), but it is a dying scene over there. In China, they have a lot of good directors too but the government censorship is suffocating. Then in my home Macau, there are two fucking theaters in the whole town… so please don’t even mention about a movie scene (actually I know there was this one person who made an independent movie which was shown in Hong Kong for a few weeks, and that’s about it). Hence, it is pretty hard out here for a pimp (or filmmaker in this case).
Legend has it that everyone who bought the initial printing of the Velvet Underground’s debut went on to form their own bands. I hope the mainstream recognition of Ang Lee will inspire other young Chinese people to follow his footsteps. It is time to start the revolution.
XXXXX
On a side note, I don’t seem to hear much about the controversy of the “gayness” of Brokeback from the other side of the globe? No one seems to care much about that. Everyone is just happy for Lee. According to my friend Andy, “Brokeback Mountain” became the first and only “indie” movie shown in a theater in Macau (I still can’t believe they actually show something other than Narnia). None of the other nominees were ever in theaters, not even in Hong Kong.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
The Tom Monaghan Town Massacre
Domino's Pizza owner Tom Monaghan, who is also a so-called "philanthropist" and a right-wing millionaire, is trying to build his own town in Florida which will strictly following "Catholic principles" -- with no place to get an abortion, pornography or birth control.
When was the last time someone did something like this? There was Jim Jones' Jonestown which ended with everybody drinking the very cool Kool-Aid (actually it was a cheaper brand, that's how cheap cults are).Even earlier, there was the Nueva Germania founded by Elizabeth Nietszche and her "Aryan" hubby. Well, that dude ended up killing himself because of the debts and Elizabeth went back to Germany. That piece of shitland became one of the poorest places in South America and a haven for inbreeding.
Good luck, Mr.Monaghan. Wait, you don't need luck. As you have said, you have "God's will" already. More importantly, he has Jeb Bush's blessing too. On second thought, he actually needs no abortion clinics, nor does he need to sell birth control. Why would he? If he got a bunch of retired old people (sorry, I know I should say seniors) in his town, why the fuck would they need that shit? He only needs to have viagra and cialis as pizza toppings.
How will this story end? I am sure that all the old fucks (I mean, respectfully, seniors) will die of heart attack after eating his high-cholesterol pizzas everyday (did I say that would be the only food source in town?). Straight to heaven, biatch.
Next time when you call Domino's, ask them if they have plan B for topping.
When was the last time someone did something like this? There was Jim Jones' Jonestown which ended with everybody drinking the very cool Kool-Aid (actually it was a cheaper brand, that's how cheap cults are).Even earlier, there was the Nueva Germania founded by Elizabeth Nietszche and her "Aryan" hubby. Well, that dude ended up killing himself because of the debts and Elizabeth went back to Germany. That piece of shitland became one of the poorest places in South America and a haven for inbreeding.
Good luck, Mr.Monaghan. Wait, you don't need luck. As you have said, you have "God's will" already. More importantly, he has Jeb Bush's blessing too. On second thought, he actually needs no abortion clinics, nor does he need to sell birth control. Why would he? If he got a bunch of retired old people (sorry, I know I should say seniors) in his town, why the fuck would they need that shit? He only needs to have viagra and cialis as pizza toppings.
How will this story end? I am sure that all the old fucks (I mean, respectfully, seniors) will die of heart attack after eating his high-cholesterol pizzas everyday (did I say that would be the only food source in town?). Straight to heaven, biatch.
Next time when you call Domino's, ask them if they have plan B for topping.
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